Earlier today I asked this man to be interviewed. He immediately rejected me and walked away with a tiny floral hammer in his hand. Now, he is back and asking for an interview.
Too much has already happened between us, I'm scared.
Jeff, how was your day today
I'll answer that question with another question...(Dad, just came in to ask if I used his iPad charger. I did not, but Jeff did. He then gave him directions to find it...we are back) lot's of typing for that one sentence, I see you are becoming a part of the liberal media.
Breaking News: Apparently I did you use Dad's charger....he even found my iPod hooked up to it...a little uncomfortable for me
What about that question you were going to ask me?
no. That was my answer (giggles....heard me type the word "giggles" giggles more...then directed me to write "giggles more" and then directed me to write that he directed me) Nods in approval (he literally said that)
Okay Jeff "[ question ]number 2, or 3, if you considered that question a question" if a hippopotamus and Joanna were hanging off a cliff, who would you feed and why?
Okay now I will use the question I was going to use for the other question. What is the circumfrence (I'm having a lot of trouble spelling that, Jason can look at this and fix it for me) of the earth?
Why are you asking me questions in this interview?
(he just got really close to me) Ask yourself that question....inteview over
He defiantly walked away to the couch and looked out in the backyard. This interview was an interesting pick. At least he wasn't like Justin who tried to suggest that I pay him 15 dollars to interview him. Interesting subject, I feel...different....more uncomfortable than usual..
Friday, May 20, 2011
Honesty.
As she draws her 2nd picture to her ladybug story. The skilled author and artist, Marie, is about to be ambushed by a series of excellent questions. (She is 6 years old)
Marie, "what" what do you want to be when you grow up?
I don't know. (Jackie tried to help her with choices, she continued answer "I don't know")
Breaking News: Marie just noticed me typing this, she keeps asking what am I doing...I don't know how to respond...I'm scared. i
Marie, if you could be any princess, who would you be and why?
I'm not telling. Besides, I don't know what that means.
Marie, do you know the muffin man?
Yes.
Marie, who is the muffin man?
I'm not telling you.
Marie, do you like me?
silence.....she then got up and left and told on me to Jeff....
Well. I guess this interview is over, along with my self-confidence.
Marie, "what" what do you want to be when you grow up?
I don't know. (Jackie tried to help her with choices, she continued answer "I don't know")
Breaking News: Marie just noticed me typing this, she keeps asking what am I doing...I don't know how to respond...I'm scared. i
Marie, if you could be any princess, who would you be and why?
I'm not telling. Besides, I don't know what that means.
Marie, do you know the muffin man?
Yes.
Marie, who is the muffin man?
I'm not telling you.
Marie, do you like me?
silence.....she then got up and left and told on me to Jeff....
Well. I guess this interview is over, along with my self-confidence.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Never
I offered Justin an interview and these were the conditions:
1)he would type it
2)he would ask the questions
3)I would have to pay him 15 dollars
Immediate answer was no.
1)he would type it
2)he would ask the questions
3)I would have to pay him 15 dollars
Immediate answer was no.
Number One Critic
As he sits on the floor, fear has just entered his eyes "are you preparing to interview me?" He then puts the play jumprope behind his head "is this really how it goes? This is a disaster waiting to happen." His son his hitting himself with a water bottle, clearly got all his traits from Jason Hebert.
Do you think your son Josh is going to be smarter than you?
Is this one of the questions? I know he will be smarter than you....or already is
What is your favorite thing about me?
**thinking a long time** how you were before this blog.
My mom just walked into the room to demostrate her pancake batter in a squirt bottle (she is very proud)Jason was a little scared.
If you could be any superhero, that is not cliche, who would be and why?
I would be blog-non blog man, and I would right all the wrong grammar on your page....and by right I mean r-i-g-h-t (little does he know, I got all 100's on every spelling test in elementary school and was the last standing third grader in the spelling bee. Thank you very much.)
How do you feel that all your kids are really smart because of Mel and definitely not you?
We share the same gene pool? (he means as in me and him, not Mel, that would be weird)
How does it feel to be my number one follower?
hmmm, does the phrase "swift kick to the gut mean anything to you?" (honestly, it really doesn't. I'm trying to understand)oh, and I am not the number one follower.
What do you want your future readers to know about you?
Taking a long time to process the question, pity him, he is a slow thinker That I don't consider them to be my future readers, but the future readers of this website...grammatically correct.
Do you think your son Josh is going to be smarter than you?
Is this one of the questions? I know he will be smarter than you....or already is
What is your favorite thing about me?
**thinking a long time** how you were before this blog.
My mom just walked into the room to demostrate her pancake batter in a squirt bottle (she is very proud)Jason was a little scared.
If you could be any superhero, that is not cliche, who would be and why?
I would be blog-non blog man, and I would right all the wrong grammar on your page....and by right I mean r-i-g-h-t (little does he know, I got all 100's on every spelling test in elementary school and was the last standing third grader in the spelling bee. Thank you very much.)
How do you feel that all your kids are really smart because of Mel and definitely not you?
We share the same gene pool? (he means as in me and him, not Mel, that would be weird)
How does it feel to be my number one follower?
hmmm, does the phrase "swift kick to the gut mean anything to you?" (honestly, it really doesn't. I'm trying to understand)oh, and I am not the number one follower.
What do you want your future readers to know about you?
Taking a long time to process the question, pity him, he is a slow thinker That I don't consider them to be my future readers, but the future readers of this website...grammatically correct.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Criticism
As he casually strums the guitar while watching the girls talk about middle school volleyball. Sal , casually looks over at me "that's the second time she's said 'casually....third time" "how dumb are the questions?" Little does he know, that my questions come from a very creative mind. My own mind. Sal just tried to turn the interview around on me. NOT SUCCESSFUL. "Julie the interview is about you, every time"- Joanna. (Joanna has managed to get into 4 out of my 5 interviews. ) "I wasn't there for the first one.Everyone is talking about ---"no one is talking Julie"...okay, this isn't making sense. I'm sorry. Also, I'm sorry for every grammatical error going on in this blog. In all honesty, I don't really care.Sal is singing right now, but I will start this interview in a few minutes.....
Sal, why do you think I am a bad interviewer?
I think it's been like 5 minutes without a single question from you
What made you play the classical guitar?
How serious am I supposed to take this? [Idiot factory(Kimee,Jackie,Joanna) says, "not at all"]
If you were an elf, what type of elf---
I'd be Legolas, you can't get around that (He then continued to talk about his man crush on Legolas...huge man crush)
If I could be any type of food, what would I be, and why?
"Waffle fries, one of the brown crispy ones nobody wants"-Joanna and Jackie (Kimee's favorite type of french fry, he also never explained why)i
Why am I getting a friend request right now?
Isn't facebook personal? ( I had just said I wasn't a personal person)
What do you look for in an icecream cone?
First of all ice cream, right consistency between not a hard shell you can't chew on and not soft enough to make it soggy (I looked away). I'm not done;furthermore, you need something that can hold ice cream in it, because if it's too thin then it falls out everywhere and ice cream is all over your hands. It also good if it has flavors on it like chocolate, chocolate is good, all in all I prefer a cup than a cone....am I getting paid for this?
What do you want your future readers to know about you?
Aren't they your future readers?
Yes, they are my future readers and Sal was the only one to realize this. Everyone else below is full of themselves and want the spotlight. Awful.
Sal, why do you think I am a bad interviewer?
I think it's been like 5 minutes without a single question from you
What made you play the classical guitar?
How serious am I supposed to take this? [Idiot factory(Kimee,Jackie,Joanna) says, "not at all"]
If you were an elf, what type of elf---
I'd be Legolas, you can't get around that (He then continued to talk about his man crush on Legolas...huge man crush)
If I could be any type of food, what would I be, and why?
"Waffle fries, one of the brown crispy ones nobody wants"-Joanna and Jackie (Kimee's favorite type of french fry, he also never explained why)i
Why am I getting a friend request right now?
Isn't facebook personal? ( I had just said I wasn't a personal person)
What do you look for in an icecream cone?
First of all ice cream, right consistency between not a hard shell you can't chew on and not soft enough to make it soggy (I looked away). I'm not done;furthermore, you need something that can hold ice cream in it, because if it's too thin then it falls out everywhere and ice cream is all over your hands. It also good if it has flavors on it like chocolate, chocolate is good, all in all I prefer a cup than a cone....am I getting paid for this?
What do you want your future readers to know about you?
Aren't they your future readers?
Yes, they are my future readers and Sal was the only one to realize this. Everyone else below is full of themselves and want the spotlight. Awful.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Bouncy Ball Emperor
As she has one earphone listening to "booty bumping" music...fear has just struck face. She heard me talking about her..."what are you talking about?" She just asked if I do this on word document "...and it's booty beats...get it right" Nikki has come to study with me and Jackie, but she had to swear to Jackie that she wouldn't talk....."I did not swear"
"Now you really make me want to stop talking"
Nikki, what are your expectations for tonight?
not expectations, but my goals are to get these program notes done
::Breaking News:::
Joanna has just come by and has complained that we didn't save her a seat even though she left go watch the Bieber movie. Just realized I was interviewing Nikki "oh this is going to be awesome"
wait you're interviewing normal people? so I'm normal? okay great!!
What do you think of Jackie as a friend?
She is awesome and she makes me feel funny because she laughs at everything I say. She would be even more awesome if she came to Soccer Sundays instead of napping through my phone calls
What do you really think of Jackie as a friend?
she would be even more awesome if she went to Soccer Sundays
Nikkie is currently talking to a friend and Joanna is singing "Never Say Never" by Justin Bieber
Do you feel creepy when you expect Jaden Smith to be attractive in the future years?
dude...have you seen Justin Bieber?
What is your favorite thing about me?
That you have a blog and I want to see it, so you need to post it online
What is your favorite pastry and why?
pastry....are cookies pastries? oh I do like cake....and juicy brownies
What do you want your future readers to know about you?
That I have a 131 bouncy ball collection....I have Spongebob one....Patrick one....one with a eyeball in it....tons of glitter ones....I really want to let them out in a racquetball room or down the stairs but I don't want to lose any of them
"Now you really make me want to stop talking"
Nikki, what are your expectations for tonight?
not expectations, but my goals are to get these program notes done
::Breaking News:::
Joanna has just come by and has complained that we didn't save her a seat even though she left go watch the Bieber movie. Just realized I was interviewing Nikki "oh this is going to be awesome"
wait you're interviewing normal people? so I'm normal? okay great!!
What do you think of Jackie as a friend?
She is awesome and she makes me feel funny because she laughs at everything I say. She would be even more awesome if she came to Soccer Sundays instead of napping through my phone calls
What do you really think of Jackie as a friend?
she would be even more awesome if she went to Soccer Sundays
Nikkie is currently talking to a friend and Joanna is singing "Never Say Never" by Justin Bieber
Do you feel creepy when you expect Jaden Smith to be attractive in the future years?
dude...have you seen Justin Bieber?
What is your favorite thing about me?
That you have a blog and I want to see it, so you need to post it online
What is your favorite pastry and why?
pastry....are cookies pastries? oh I do like cake....and juicy brownies
What do you want your future readers to know about you?
That I have a 131 bouncy ball collection....I have Spongebob one....Patrick one....one with a eyeball in it....tons of glitter ones....I really want to let them out in a racquetball room or down the stairs but I don't want to lose any of them
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